Work & People

Today was one of those days... or should I say... one of those VERY FEW days where I actually feel the taunt string of patience snap and actually lose my temper. I think it was so amazing, that even my boss lady was amused.

So what happened was this:

I was working on this huge client file, and it's hella big, but they are REALLY organized so that helped a lot. The problem was with the copying though =_= The new admin lady did the copying for this one and how I knew it was her was because of two things:

#1: For the general partner, my boss-boss, only the two admin get to copy/organize his things, because he feels that his accountants are really valuable ($$ price) so we should be focusing on preparing returns while they get everything organized so we can do our jobs better

#2: Her handwriting was on the post-it attached to a huge 1099 packet.

Well, I was going through the client's binder when I noticed two original pages of a 1099 statement were in the file and it really unsettled me. So I went up to get the client's envelope full of originals to see if maybe what we had was a copy -- but I was sure what I had in my hand was an original, because of the paper texture. And then, I opened up the envelope, leafed through the documents and saw it: pages 3 & 4 of the statement that I only had the first 2 pages for, so the originals were missing the 2 pages I had in my hand. This was a really small mistake, but she needed to know what she did in order to not do it again, so I went up to the front to talk to her.

When I got there, I was like, "N? Did you work on [insert client's name]'s file?" I said it in my politest tone possible -- despite the fact that I was annoyed as hell. She was like, "Oh, I can't remember." (She sounded scared and when she said she couldn't remember, that was probably the truth 'cause her memory span never really lasts any longer than 5 seconds in my opinion.) She went to go check her timesheets, and she asked if it was done this week, and I said, "I don't know" -- I mean seriously, I have like a lot of clients' actual info to remember and enough trouble trying remember what I'VE done, let alone whether or not other people have done what they were supposed to do. She only went back two timesheets and said that she really couldn't remember and that she would have to look at it. (I'm thinking to myself... I don't have time for this...)

I then just pretended it wasn't her fault and went ahead to say, "Well, it's like this. I was just doing this client's file when I noticed two pages of the client's original 1099 hole-punched and in the binder. I went to open the client's envelope and these two pages were missing. We need to send these back to the client so we can't have pages of their documents missing."

She looked at me, flustered, and said, "I'm not sure what you're talking about."

My boss lady -- though I didn't know it at the time -- was in her office listening to us, and my friend (the other admin), was sitting there typing and also listening to us. I think they both started to hear the change in my tone ... though a gradual one.

I looked at the lady and was thinking that maybe what I was saying really didn't make sense, so I separated pages 1&2 from 3&4 into two piles and pointed to the right pile (1-2) and said, "This was in the client's binder." I then pointed to the pile on the left (3-4), and said, "This was in the client's green envelope. This" (I held up 1-2) "should have been together with this" (I put 1-2 with 3-4) "in the client's green envelope, but it wasn't." (Breathe) "There are times when the client will want us to keep the originals for them, but since we have an envelope full of originals, it means we will be sending their originals back and therefore cannot have this happen. Unless we are keeping the documents for them, we never punch holes in the originals and put them in the binder."

She still didn't understand what I was saying, and went on to say, "How do you know that I was not the only one to touch the originals?" (Very defensive)

And I was thinking to myself ... the 2 reasons listed above... but I said instead, "I don't know that for certain, but I do know that we only go grab the originals ourselves when we think we may be missing something and it might not have been copied. That way we will know what to ask the client for what's still outstanding." (I felt my hands shake, because when I am angry, my hands shake ... plus... I was on my second cup of coffee)

She went on to say that she copies everything unless told not to copy something -- I thought to myself, even when you are told not to copy shit, you still copy it =_= -- because she thought I was trying to blame her for not copying the last 2 pages of the 1099, but that wasn't my point. My point was that I found two originals in our binder, which should have been in the f**king envelope and it wasn't, and she had to get really defensive on me and say, "How do you know that someone else other than me didn't touch the originals?" (It can only be you, because you're the only person who does stupid shit like this. Granted you're new, it's still quite inexcusable when you can't even get something this logical right. It's just plain sad.)

I'm not sure what she went on to say next, it might have been along the lines that I was blaming her for something she probably didn't do -- I hate it when people can't own up to their own stupid mistakes -- but I do remember myself saying this, "I never said it was you." (It's true, I not once said "You did this wrong, blah blah blah") "I only asked if you worked on this and you said you couldn't remember, so that was that. I am only telling you what happened and why it is such a problem because you're new, and so I was just letting you know that if you ever come across something like this in the future, you will know what to do. That was all I was saying. There is no need to get so defensive."

(Out of everyone in the firm, I was the first one to call her out on being defensive and I think I really did strike a chord. I was the kindest with my words of criticism, because my senior tax manager is the harshest out of everyone in the firm and when she finds that you did something wrong, she will ream you and destroy you ... yeah, I'm not joking. She is feared like God. Anyway...)

The admin lady got more flustered when I said that, and I said, "In any case, that's all." I'm not sure what she said then, because I was so blinded with rage and my hands were shaking so uncontrollably that I had to remove myself from that place. I simply walked back to my office and tried to regain my composure. I vented to my office mate and she found it pretty hilarious actually 'cause I actually snapped.

Meanwhile, my boss lady -- she missed the last half of the conversation 'cause she went into my boss's office -- but she went up to my friend, the other admin, and said to her -- when the new lady wasn't up there, "Did you hear how exasperated Hisaya got when talking to N?" My friend nodded and was like, "Yeah." My boss lady was like, "If Hisaya can get that exasperated, that is really saying something."

My friend went to go tell me this later on when she needed to vent about the new lady. She was processing some returns and the new lady went over there to work on something when there wasn't any room in the area to start with, so my friend decided to stop what she was doing to let her do what she needed to do and come to our office.

But the meaning behind what my boss lady's words was this:

Out of everyone in the firm, I had an almost interminable amount of patience. I almost never lose my temper and I am very tactful and diplomatic. I am maybe one of the nicest people in the firm, and I hardly ever show my anger even if I am seething inside, so if someone can make me as exasperated as they did today, that is saying that that person is really no good for the firm.

I was pretty surprised with how high of esteem my boss lady held me in, really pleasantly surprised, I guess. But, this lady has been making mistakes nonstop and she hasn't gotten a single thing right since she came here to work, so it has been really grating everyone's nerves -- not just mine, EVERYONE's. She can't type right, she can't copy right, she seriously can't do anything right so anything she does, one of us has to fix it. It's been a real pain. She is a nice person -- when you're not telling her to be careful about a mistake she made regardless of how nice you put it -- but she is really lacking in the common sense department and she is extremely defensive. The last admin lady we had was a royal bitch, this one is a cupcake compared to that one, but she is so incompetent, it's sad.

I have been so patient with her, but her inability to admit fault and to try and pass it off to someone else was pretty unacceptable to me. Even though I wanted to say that she did it, I didn't 'cause I wanted her to have that stupid wiggle room, and I couldn't say anything without solid proof. I think the only smart thing she did today, was not go back an extra week 'cause if she did, my client's name would have been on that timesheet. I will give her smart points for that. At least now I have to keep it ambiguous as though she didn't do it, but her not so smart points is this .... I do the timesheet entries at the beginning of every month and I'm pretty certain that I will be doing them next week, so if I see my client's name on that thing, I will be laughing my ass off. No, I won't go to her about it 'cause it's not worth it, but it will at least validate that I wouldn't have gone up to her without reason. Well, even if she didn't do it, I would have told her anyway 'cause she's the newest person here so it's no surprise if she screws up, but to not be able to make copies is kind of sad. (She can't even stack paper straight or staple straight... her stapled packets fan out like as in a Japanese fan spread out =_= and sometimes... the thicker returns are stacked like the paper version of a leaning tower of Pisa)

It's really sad.

But... on a good note. She did come to apologize for her behavior when I was on lunch. I said it was ok and it did feel much better for her to say that. She has some redeemable quality in that sense. I think I can work with that.

But the funniest part of the day was how my boss lady found it amusing that this lady was amazing enough to make me exasperated. And I mean it when I say that I am REALLY patient when I am at work. I will get irritated and swallow it down, but I don't become that visibly frustrated with people. I have never had my hands shake like that at work ever, this was definitely the first time I felt such rage. Yeah, I have gotten angry with people before too like when my former office manager was there and she was so mean, but I think I cowered more from fear 'cause she had the means to make your life living hell. Still, I have never felt my hands shake from such fury before. I have to say, even I was amazed myself with how I snapped.

I thought I was a royal bitch later though, but my friend was like, "No, you were great. When you told her that there was no need to get so defensive, I was like "Yes! Go Hisaya!" Telling it like it is was definitely the right thing."

I really thought I was a super bitch, because my hands were shaking so bad, but if my friend -- she can't lie -- told me that I did not then I will believe that. Still, I am glad she came over to apologize for how she spoke to me, 'cause she really was in the wrong and for her to not take responsibility was really inappropriate. Everyone knew it was her, there's no question about it.

I may be younger to her -- and that's why I was trying to be nice -- but I am a professional and my job status is above her. I also have more seniority than her at work, because I have been there longer and know the lay of the land better. I know how things should be run, granted I still make dumb as f**k mistakes now and then and sometimes too often for my own liking, but I know the basics and if I tell her to do something, she shouldn't make it seem like I'm overstepping my bounds.

When I first started to work, people don't always tell me the mistakes I made so I kept making the same stupid mistakes. I took time today to tell her what mistake she made so she could be careful in the future -- granted I didn't explicity say it was her. I took MY time, which is VERY VALUABLE right now 'cause it's 13 days before April 15th and I can't be wasting my time instructing people on how to copy or organize things. I have lots of clients' stuff to do and I have to get into an argument over something this trivial? *sigh*

Anyway, I hope this means we'll be going off in the right direction from now on. I think I might have really stabbed her with the "No need to be so defensive" line though, but my friend said she was really proud of me when I said that 'cause people were tired of hearing her excuses.

In a way, I felt like a grownup today. I took care of the problem somewhat like an adult, though the anger factor I'll deduct points on, but at least I didn't go all full-blown bitch and chew her out. So I guess today was an interesting day for me in which I was able to change some people's opinions on me for the better, and able also get my message across to the one who needed to hear it. So it was kind of a good day.